journaling

I have posted some of the pictures from our Christmas Eve ER adventure. I wasn't sure I wanted to write about it but feel if I don't express the gratitude I have for the miracle we witnessed in our family that it will be forgotten in time. We are beings, humans, and we say we will never forget, and always remember....and then time happens, and life gets busy and blurred and the details that make miracles memorable fade a little. We remember we were blessed, but we forget how deeply and intimately those blessings were witnessed to us, as time passes.

Friday was and will be forever one of those days.

Gavin had asked me Thursday night if I could drive him up to PC to ski for Christmas Eve. His friend Dom had been hurt the day before and would not be able to ski, and his friend Nate had also been injured....Gavin and Noah would need a ride. We picked up Noah, with a stern reminder that the boys stay together and NO INJURIES PLEASE. In fact I drove passed the hospital on the way and pleaded that neither of them "end up" there today.

On the way home I checked in on my mom, who is hospitalized with some complications to her health, then called my Grandfather with an update. While on the phone with Grandpa I received a few calls from Gavin's phone. Embarrassingly I did not take the first call from Gavin. There are the times he forgets something...wants me to "run" back up please.....I thought " I will call him right back". When the call persisted I said to Grandpa..." I must answer Gavin's call, I wonder if something is wrong". Little did I know.

Gavin's friend Noah was on the line. He told me that Gavin had been seriously hurt. He was with Ski Patrol and they would be calling me right away. And then he hung up. Being a 16 year old boy...he had not much to say and I believe he was quite in shock himself. He had seen Gavin fall, seen the blood on Gavins face, the unconscious and unable to awaken him caused fear and trauma to Noah. No one wants to see their friend like that.

After a few minutes wait, and panic begins to rise in me I called Noah back. He didn't answer. I texted him, "Noah, please call me". He called. He said Gavin was taken down to Ski Patrol center and they will call me. Gavin was unconscious and had some memory loss. I have never felt such fear.

Ski Patrol called. They told me that Gavin had fallen on his head, they think...

They asked me about his health, in general. Asked me for permission to treat him. Asked me about our insurance.

They told me that Gavin had not been able to move his toes, that he couldn't feel his legs but they thought it was temporary. They said he had memory loss, he thought he was 15 ...maybe 14 [he is 16!], that he didn't know his name, his address, his phone number....but he did know he was in Park City.

They needed specific insurance information. I had to call Brian.

Brian said I sounded so calm. I was able to get the information to Vickie, of Ski Patrol and she said she would call me as soon as they had any information. She said they would probably Air Vac him to University Hospital. She did not want me driving up the canyon until they knew what they needed to do for Gavin.

I hung up. And then I really began to panic and cry and ....well, I began to feel really sick. There I was pulled to the side of the road and my world felt it was falling apart. My baby boy....almost grown up, and what was going to happen to him. I realized I hadn't told her to tell him I love him....

I called Vickie back. She answered immediately. I said, "would you please tell Gavin I love him?"

She answered, "honey, I already did. don't worry. we are going to take good care of him, we will bring him to you. He knows. He knows you love him."

I will never forget those words, the feeling, the peace that came knowing that he was in good hands. Good care, the ski patrol, and that of Father in Heaven. He was going to be fine. I just knew.

I called Brian back and told him everything I knew...which wasn't much, but I knew he would be okay. I just knew.

I came home and told the children. I couldn't stop crying but was able to kneel with them in prayer.


Ski Patrol called back. They told me all the GOOD NEWS first.

Gavin had no nerve damage....that is GOOD.

Gavin was able to feel his legs, and move his toes, he was remembering things, all the things he needed to remember, just not the fall, not the crash.

The x-rays showed no breaks in his neck or back.

However due to the memory loss and initial unconsciousness they didn't feel they could release him from the backboard without advanced imaging. They were sending him to Primary Children's Medical Center.

I could meet him there in one hour.

We were to the hospital at the exact moment that Gavin was brought in. They took me right back and Clarissa stayed in the waiting room with Sam and Jeremy.

There was Noah, Gavin's friend. Just standing, almost in shock, holding Gavin's patient belongings. I just hugged him. I could feel his fear and wanted him to know I appreciated him being there with Gavin. Was he okay? ...he said he was, but time....time will always tell.

I walked him to the waiting room after seeing Gavin. I wanted both boys to be healed...to be comforted...to be SKIING...throwing their tricks, this all behind them and all to be well. It was my prayer in my heart the rest of that afternoon.

Gavin had great doctors. First when you see a familiar face, ...and find out that familiar face is the person in care of your child, you somehow know that all will be well.

Dr. Douglas Neilson was Gavins Emergency Care doctor, I have worked with him through the School Community Councils for Wasatch Elementary and East High School. We have fought some issues together and some we have fought against each others positions, but that day, that moment, we had the same agenda....to fight for Gavin. That all would be well for him, and his health and well being. The thought....what is in the best interest of the child....our SCC motto...crossed my mind and heart. I knew Gavin would be well in his care.


He ran ALL the tests...he carefully tended to Gavin. And he walked us out of the ER. WALKED....yes, Gavin walked out. He was going to be fine. Time to recover will be necessary, but all was well and Gavin walked out.

We know this Christmas miracle is ours. And we are thankful. Raising children is the single most important thing I will ever do. It is with hardships and with celebrations, both I would take on any day to have the experience of being my children's mother. They are amazing beings and I am thankful they are ours.

Gavin is still recovering, and wont be back on those JUMPS for 3-5 weeks....if I have my way it would be EVER but I can not choose for him. With risk of injury he has to live his life, my hearts prayer and desire is that he will recognize that life is fragile and that he is not invincible, as teens tend to feel. With tender loving care I hope he will be a little careful in tending to the life I love so completely, his life.

Get well soon Gav. WE LOVE YOU! Every day there are opportunities to recognize blessings and miracles. Some more obvious than others, but with each step we make, and breath we take we have a lot more gratitude this Christmas Season. We approach the New Year knowing that God does hear and answer prayers. So many of you, our loved ones, include us in daily prayers. Thank you. We know your faith is a shield protecting us from what in all our challenges could certainly be worse.