Friday, July 22, 2011

growing pain!



...painS!!!

A few weeks ago Jeremy woke up with some pretty MAJOR growing pains. The events of the night touched my soul and heart, and if I could have taken the pain for him I would have. It witnessed to me more the importance of having a Savior, who has and will always bear pain for and with us. Sappy I know, because most often when I am struggling, aka GROWING, I don't feel much relief from the trial, but a portion of my Faith knows that He is there. And a greater portion of my wisdom and faith understands that if all the pains were taken from me the growth would be taken as well.

I heard myself say to Jeremy that wee hour of the morning,
"I am sorry what you are going through hurts so much,
but just think...tomorrow you will be a little taller.
If your legs don't hurt,
they can't grow,
and you will always be short!"

We prayed together,
and he FINALLY fell asleep,
right about the time my alarm went off.



I have been thinking of this alot! I really do realize that nothing I go thru is without reason, without purpose.
Even though a LOT of it I would rather not experience,
in the long run the experience I gain
is not something I want to give up.

I am taller;
emotionally, spiritually, mentally,
maturitally'

[i know it is not a word
...let it work here]

and even physically.

That said, yesterday had a FEW too many growing pains.

In a rush to record my feelings blogging will have to suffice.
I have had no sleep through the night, after a terribly wonderful long day yesterday.

I now have two very sick kids. I pulled myself off the bathroom floor, crawled into bed right about the time the first one woke up.

Mind you....I am so thankful that he woke me up.

I have had enough of my kids growing up and dealing with stuff on their own.
I want them to need me. And last night...all night, they needed me!

Yesterday:

Growing Pain #1
Gavin got his drivers license!!! Pretty big deal I would say.

Putting my first baby out on the road! :)

On the way home he asked if we could stop at Whole Foods.
Sure....pizza maybe???
Nope, he had to give them a copy of his BRAND NEW drivers license and his social so that he could accept his FIRST JOB!!!!

[i suppose this could be growing pain #1 and #2!!!]

Growing Pain #3
Clarissa and Jeremy had their year physicals. On the way up the elevator Clarissa told me that if she needed shots she did NOT want me in the room with her. It would make it hurt more, she stated.

She said,
"that's what you get when you send me off to Trek!
I grow up and can do some stuff on my own."


Great!

The nurse measured her and said she was 62 inches!

"Wait, what???"
i ask

nurse:
"62 inches."

me:
"How much is that in feet?"

nurse:
"5 feet, 1 and 1/2 inches!!!"

me:
[silence]

I feel the tears coming.
THAT IS EXACTLY
HOW TALL I AM!

I am thinking...this is not happening.
Why do they HAVE to grow up?

I look away and of course directly in my line of sight is a mother,
tenderly holding her newborn baby girl.

Embarrassingly I blink away the beginning of tears.
And they fall on my cheek.


Clarissa, "Mom, you are seriously not crying are you???!!!"


Me: "of course not."

Her: "what, do you NOT want us to grow up???"


Me: in my mind
NO, ...not this fast.
Not all in one day.


my children's lives are literally flashing before my eyes
....i blinked, they grew up!



The doctor comes into the exam room.
Clarissa looks at me.
With all the cheerfulness she can muster!
"ummm, you can leave now. I will be okay!"


But I wont...I wont be okay.
I settle into a chair in the waiting room



Jeremy's nurse comes for him and we go back for his appointment. The doctor asks all the right questions. Jeremy mostly talks for himself now. He knows the answers.

The doctor asks:
"Mom, do you have any concerns!"

Me:
"Can you make them stop growing?"


I remember Jeremy's growing pains.
I ask, "Still Tylenol and a warm bath", not really asking. I have done this four times.

"Yes."
the doctor replies.

And Jeremy says,
"Mom, my growing pains are fine.
I had them last night and didn't even wake you up
because I just prayed.
And it worked!"

[insert growing pain #4 here]


He JUST prayed.

Great.

Looks like he has that figured out too.





I can't keep them little,
anymore than I can get a
clear picture of the
home-run hit
from right field!
oh, and this kid...he is babysitting today.
with Clarissa sick, he took her job!
baseball to babysitting to.....?

Yep, Growth [pain #5+++] hurts!
let them grow...let them go.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

my happiness!

Daisypath - Personal pictureDaisypath Anniversary tickers
“You will have significant experiences. I hope that you will write them down and keep a record of them, that you will read them from time to time and refresh your memory of those meaningful and significant things. Some may be funny. Some may be significant only to you. Some of them may be sacred and quietly beautiful. Some may build one upon another until they represent a lifetime of special experiences.” ~Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley

COURAGE to HEAL

COURAGE to HEAL
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